So we have been here a solid three weeks now. Like ¾ths of a month and almost 1/9th of our trip. Three weeks down and I have realized how heavily guarded I am. I’m open. I’ll tell you my story and everything and you’ll get all the outside stuff, but if you try to dive too deep, the walls are up. And I don’t even think it’s an issue with trust, because I HATE going too deep into my own thoughts. I will listen to someone else all day, but I’m not very fond of thinking about myself. I don’t know why, but I do not enjoy trying to figure out why I do what I do or why I feel a certain way. Who am I? I can give you characteristics and tell you I’m a child of the living God, but beneath that I honestly don’t think I know. I have prayed since I signed up that God would smash me to bits, so that He can build me up. So that I know who I am and can confidently say that He is the solid rock, and firm foundation on which I stand. It’s going to be a hard process, no doubt, but it’s necessary. I am clay in the hands of My Father.
“My soul, wait silently for God
alone,
For my expectation is from Him.
He only is my rock and my
salvation;
He is my defense;
I shall not be moved.” ~Psalms 62:5-6
“My soul, wait silently for God
alone,
For my expectation is from Him.
He only is my rock and my
salvation;
He is my defense;
I shall not be moved.” ~Psalms 62:5-6