Hours before my flight, my mind is bombarded with questions...
I question the significance of my part...this role I'm playing.
I worry that He will not use me in the way I have imagined in my head.
I am unsure, and I feel inadequate. I am walking into the unknown, uncharted waters, so I'm anxious. It's like I have the lamp ahead of me to light my path, but I still walk cautiously to make sure the next step I take is safe.
I see people say I'm a "world changer", but I don't feel it!
I wonder what will happen afterwards...Will my heart be in El Salvador? Will I never want to come back to the U.S.? Or will I never want to leave the U.S. again?
Will I fold under the pressures of this trip and crack under Satan's strength? Or will I stand strong in the Lord, bend to His will and be clay in His hands?
It's hard not to have expectations, but I'm expecting incredible things. What if incredible things don't happen?
Just as these questions roll into my mind, I am forced to remember that it is not about ME. In this movie called life, I am not the star. I'm a tiny piece of a puzzle much larger than I could ever imagine. It doesn't matter how significant my role is, because all of the pieces of this puzzle matter and all are important to God. The mundane things matter to Him just as much as the big things. I worry about how much He will move in El Salvador. And as much as I'd like to know, He owes me no answer. His thoughts and ways are much higher than mine. However, I do know that He is an incredible God. I prayed bold prayers, and I wholeheartedly believe that He will show up and show off in El Salvador.
I am just in awe that He has called ME to go. Of all the people my glorious God could've chosen, He chose me. And with that being said, I know that He will equip me with all I need, even if I feel inadequate. Following God isn't about feeling, it's about faith. Faith. noun. Strong belief and trust in someone. I trust Him. He has brought me this far, so why wouldn't I? I can plan my steps, but He directs my path. He leads me, he comes behind me and has His hand on my head to guide me. My God is my strength, my personal bravery and my invincible army. Whom shall I fear?
I will not fear,
God you are with me.
I know You're near,
You'll never leave me.
I will trust in You alone....
I question the significance of my part...this role I'm playing.
I worry that He will not use me in the way I have imagined in my head.
I am unsure, and I feel inadequate. I am walking into the unknown, uncharted waters, so I'm anxious. It's like I have the lamp ahead of me to light my path, but I still walk cautiously to make sure the next step I take is safe.
I see people say I'm a "world changer", but I don't feel it!
I wonder what will happen afterwards...Will my heart be in El Salvador? Will I never want to come back to the U.S.? Or will I never want to leave the U.S. again?
Will I fold under the pressures of this trip and crack under Satan's strength? Or will I stand strong in the Lord, bend to His will and be clay in His hands?
It's hard not to have expectations, but I'm expecting incredible things. What if incredible things don't happen?
Just as these questions roll into my mind, I am forced to remember that it is not about ME. In this movie called life, I am not the star. I'm a tiny piece of a puzzle much larger than I could ever imagine. It doesn't matter how significant my role is, because all of the pieces of this puzzle matter and all are important to God. The mundane things matter to Him just as much as the big things. I worry about how much He will move in El Salvador. And as much as I'd like to know, He owes me no answer. His thoughts and ways are much higher than mine. However, I do know that He is an incredible God. I prayed bold prayers, and I wholeheartedly believe that He will show up and show off in El Salvador.
I am just in awe that He has called ME to go. Of all the people my glorious God could've chosen, He chose me. And with that being said, I know that He will equip me with all I need, even if I feel inadequate. Following God isn't about feeling, it's about faith. Faith. noun. Strong belief and trust in someone. I trust Him. He has brought me this far, so why wouldn't I? I can plan my steps, but He directs my path. He leads me, he comes behind me and has His hand on my head to guide me. My God is my strength, my personal bravery and my invincible army. Whom shall I fear?
I will not fear,
God you are with me.
I know You're near,
You'll never leave me.
I will trust in You alone....